REVIEW - Hold On To Your Butts is an absolutely hilarious production that will have you roaring with laughter throughout!

On Tuesday, we went to Lowry, Salford to see Hold On To Your Butts. Read what our reviewer Christa Norton thought about this amazing show...

Normally when I go to the theatre, I know what I am in for. That is to say I have some vague idea of what to expect on stage. But a Jurassic Park parody – I must admit I had no idea where to begin. Muppets? Huge inflatable dinosaur costumes that became all the rage during COVID and videos of which continue to fill my social media feed? Songs? One man and some highly intricate shadow puppets? These were the many questions that filled my mind as I headed to Lowry last night.

Of one thing I was certain: anything willing to name itself after Samuel L Jackson’s iconic line (shortly before he gets eaten *spoiler*) was going to be fun.

I wasn’t wrong. Hold On To Your Butts is an absolutely hilarious production that will have you roaring (!) with laughter throughout.

Hold On To Your Butts, presented by Recent Cutbacks, is a parody of Steven Spielberg’s 1993 blockbuster movie Jurassic Park. Based on Michael Crichton’s novel, the original film is set on a remote island where scientists have brought dinosaurs back to life through genetic engineering. Wealthy entrepreneur John Hammond – played by Richard Attenborough - invites a group of experts to tour his soon-to-open theme park to assure investors of its safety. The group includes paleontologist Dr. Alan Grant – played by Sam Neill; a paleobotanist Dr. Ellie Sattler – played by Laura Dern; and mathematician Dr. Ian Malcolm – played oh so very memorably by Jeff Goldblum. It also includes Hammond’s grandchildren Lex and Tim, played by Ariana Richards and Joseph Mazzello, respectively.

While initially amazed and awed by the living dinosaurs, the visitors soon discover the park’s flaws. Chaos ensues when a disgruntled employee sabotages the park’s security system, causing the electric fences containing the dinosaurs to fail, allowing deadly dinosaurs, including the ferocious Tyrannosaurus Rex and cunning Velociraptors, to escape.

Dr. Grant, Ellie, and the children navigate the island, facing numerous perilous encounters with the freed dinosaurs before ultimate escaping, leaving the failed park behind.

In the space of a mere 60 minutes, Hold On To Your Butts faithfully – and mercilessly – recreates every key moment of Jurassic Park, using just two actors - Jack Baldwin (The Play That Goes Wrong, Secret Invasion, Henry IV) and Charlie Richards (The Unfriend, The Play That Goes Wrong, Say Your Prayers), a sound effects genius  - Charlie Ives (The Puppet Master, Hunting the Ultimate Conman, Private Lives), and a variety of props that range from the inspired to the silly to tell the story.

With the audience bathed in green light, having been treated to the Jurassic Park soundtrack whilst we waited, the show starts in the same way any respectable film would: trailers. And – just like when you go to the cinema – there is a case to be made that the trailers were the best bit. They were certainly hilarious. Projected onto the stage, we watched pre-recorded trailers for Brief Encounter (two men walking past each other and saying “Hi”); Inside Out (a couple realising their jumpers were on the wrong way) and – most brilliantly, an inspired rethinking of a trailer for The Matrix, complete with slow motion fighting. That trailer alone was worth the price of the ticket.

Trailers complete, it was time for the main feature, and what a tour de force this production of Hold On To Your Butts is. The two actors perform every single character in the film, using not just props but mimicking the original actors voices to keep track of who’s who. Between them, they must deliver at least 80% of the original dialogue, all without missing a beat; it’s an impressive feat of memorisation if nothing else. But it’s not just the characters they play: the dinosaurs are all included, fossils, animations, even the poor goat is given life on stage, albeit briefly! Both Baldwin and Richards commit 100%, keeping straight-faced even when pretending a cocktail umbrella is a helicopter, or a bike helmet and traffic cone are a realistic costume for a Tyrannosaurus Rex. It would be easy to miss lines, to lose track of which character they are playing (often two or three in the same scene), or to slip into improvisation or ad lib, but for the most part they keep their attention wholly on offering an earnest and heartfelt rendition. For me, this makes the overall production all the more charming.

Perhaps the one place where they do relax a little is in the performance of Jeff Goldblum’s Dr Malcolm. And when I say ‘a little’, I mean that they are utterly merciless in their parody. Both actors took on the role of Dr Malcolm at various points, and both took every opportunity to affectionately lampoon Goldblum’s distinctive vocal tics and idiosyncrasies, not to mention his frequently half buttoned shirt.

Baldwin and Richards are ably assisted by Ives, whose inventiveness and attention to detail for the sound effects is a masterclass to watch – or rather to hear. She squeaks, slurps, sings and enunciates non stop, giving voice to each of the dinosaurs, to computers, even to the making of a sandwich.

Beyond the performances themselves, there are some really clever touches that take this production of Hold On To Your Butts to the next level. For example, a more general backing track of generic sound effects also includes some lovely a capella three part arrangements of John William’s score, arranged by Recent Cutbacks co-founder Kelsey Didion. It’s quite an inspired move: using the original music at key moments in the retelling adds to the nostalgia – especially as the arrangements are really pleasing to listen to - but by bringing in an arrangement rather than always using the orchestral soundtrack itself, it also helps keep the audience buying into the silliness on stage. 

And the props, whilst simple, are at times incredibly effective. For example, in recreating the famous glass of water scene, the actors framed a glass with a large square, and then a small square to simulate the zooming in of the camera.

It is an absolute powerhouse of a show whose success is completely dependent on the fact that its three performers never miss a beat. The performance lasted just over 75 minutes and left me wanting more – and the same could definitely be said for the audience last night who, like me, were roaring with laughter. It’s certainly reliant on having seen then film – I fear it wouldn’t make any sense otherwise – and I would say is certainly suitable for older children and teens. Funny, affectionate and relishing the nostalgia, Hold On To Your Butts is a must-see production for anyone looking for an evening of laughter.

WE SCORE HOLD ON TO YOUR BUTTS...




WATCH OUR "IN CONVERSATION WITH JACK BALDWIN" VIDEO


Hold On To Your Butts is on at Lowry, Salford until Saturday 15th February 2025 and then can be seen at The Octagon, Bolton on March 18th and 19th


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